flower language has always been an intense source of disappointment for me
like, they all mean really generic things like “love” or “forever” or “i’m sorry”
i thought you could combine flowers
like you could just send someone a bouquet and from the combination of hibiscus and posies and tulips they’d understand “the rebel leader is dead, rendezvous at the docks at 8, bring the dog, you will need lighter fluid and a large tomato”
my life changed forever when i found out the word “slang” was actually slang for “shortened language”
there’s this unspoken law in britain that you’re not to phone anyone while doctor who’s on, and it was on and the phone rang and my brother was the one that had to pick it up, and he didn’t even say ‘hello’ or anything, he just picked it up and went, “WHO THE FUCK IS RINGING WHILE DOCTOR WHO’S ON?” and the person on the other end went, “DOCTOR WHO’S ON? I’LL CALL YOU BACK!”, and hung up.
We don’t even know who it was, I just—